#128 memories

Because I don't remember much that I don't make a note of, I am always in awe of those with a fantastic memory.  Two examples come to mind:

One is Carlos, a high school student who is a waiter at my favorite Mexican restaurant.  My friend and I always order the same thing, albeit with quirks and special requests.  Carlos  knows our order the moment we walk in and has drinks waiting before we sit down.  He remembers every last detail, down to the steak knife to cut the quesadilla, without so much as a word.  I hope that Carlos won't spend his life waiting tables because I am confident that memory such as his would take him far in an academic setting, but for now, it makes for a truly pleasant dining experience. 

When I think of an amazing memory, I also think of Andy, an ex-admissions staffer, now development officer.  The same gifts that allowed him to develop relationships with prospective students are helping him to make friends with donors.  By remembering the little details and showing people that he truly has distinguished them as an individual, he sets himself apart from those appealing for other worthy causes.  He listens to what donors are passionate about and matches it with what he heard on campus about the institution's needs.  He has a long and prosperous career ahead of him in the advancement field.

I have a terrible memory, and so have devised my own systems as a way to remember details.  (Let's just say that it involves putting everything in writing!).  What traits are true gifts for you and how can you match them with aspects of your career?  And conversely, in what ways can you compensate for your shortcomings?  We all can't have the memory of Carlos and Andy, but we are all great at something.  Find your greatness and let it shine.

-- beth triplett
leadershipdots.blogspot.com
@leadershipdots
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#127 managerial observations

Yesterday I was interviewed by two students in a management class whose assignment was to understand some of my perspectives as a manager.  One of the questions they asked was whether I have had any negative experiences as a manager and how I handled them. 

I wanted to just refer them to yesterday's blog post, but as my mind flooded with examples of the not-so-fun-side of supervision I realized that personnel problems often fall into two main categories.

One is like "eating the couch" (see #126) where an employee knows the expectations, but fails to meet them.  Often a good person does a singular act that results in firing.  Those situations require a significant and swift response in managerial action.

More often than not, managers are dealing with more subtle and on-going performance issues.  The employee may not understand the expectations, or may not have the skill or motivation to meet them.  This requires very different tactics from the manager, including repeated coaching, performance plans in writing, frequent feedback and monitoring.  There is nothing quick about this process; but, unlike scenario one where the result almost always ends with an employee departure, I have had much success in coaching employees and helping them become productive and successful members of my team.

The students asked me advice that I would give them should they become managers, and my answer is the same whether you are a manager, colleague, family member or part of any relationship.  Learn to give feedback without drama.  Cultivate the skill of being able to point out where someone is not meeting your expectations in a way that is timely, direct, brief and without a swell of emotion around it.  You'll have much more success if you calmly help your staff know what great looks like for you.

-- beth triplett
leadershipdots.blogspot.com
@leadershipdots
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#126 a mess

I came home from work to discover that my dogs (ages 15 months and 7 months) had eaten the end of the arm off my couch.  Yes, it was de-stuffed right down to the wood foundation and my living room looked like there had been a pillow fight.

I am sometimes on better behavior in the office than at home, so when I am really upset I try to act with my 4-legged "children" the way I would respond if they were employees.  So I didn't yell or scream; instead I put the dogs into their crates, locked the doors, and went to my desk to find the silver lining lesson in all of this so I could write about it.

At first, I didn't believe that anything equivalent to this had ever happened at work.  But when I really thought about it, I realized that in fact I recently had an employee "eat my couch".  It was an isolated incident, but serious and we needed to take action quickly and calmly.  Yelling wasn't involved; blame wasn't involved.  There was an egregious action and swift consequences for it.  

We have all made errors: in calculations, in judgment or in risk assessment.  When something happens that is outside of the acceptable norm, I believe that you quietly and calmly clean up the mess and learn from it.  And then you quickly move on.  Spending the evening stewing about the mess caused by my hounds is no more productive than dwelling on what could have/should have been with my employee.  A mess only remains a mess until you take action to move beyond it.

-- beth triplett
leadershipdots.blogspot.com
@leadershipdots
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#125 short sightedness

I am all for good budget stewardship, but I saw two cases this week where I think prudence outweighed good sense.

At Homecoming, we had an "alumni tent"; a place for alums to gather and socialize during the afternoon.  It is a great idea and the tent was filled with people sharing happy memories of their alma mater.  And, instead of our providing a healthy dose of hospitality with the facility, we proceeded to charge our alums a dollar for water or pop; five dollars if they wanted nachos and, of course, more cash for the beer.  What were we thinking?  Wouldn't it have been better to welcome alums with a free drink ticket or two?  Or give free beer in exchange for a contribution to the school.  Or at least have the nachos on the house.  These are our most engaged alumni; they travelled back to campus and are participating at the events and we ask them to pull out their wallet for trivial expenses.  The old saying of "penny wise and pound foolish" comes into my mind.

And then it happened again with the "appreciation day" for city volunteers and committee members.  The city owns the golf course, but still charged $5 for participants to play a round.  Why?  Couldn't they have truly said thank you by absorbing the five bucks?  Forgo the hamburger at the end if you have to, but taking money from the one you are trying to thank and putting it back into your revenue stream sounds to me more like a sale instead of a recognition event.

I am confident that both sets of organizers had good intentions and were trying to work within budget constraints.  I propose that they would have been better of with a focus on the long term benefits of those dollars rather than just the short-term expense of them.  You want your invitees to say "wow", but not in the context of "wow, are they really making me pay for this?"

-- beth triplett
leadershipdots.blogspot.com
@leadershipdots
leadershipdots@gmail.com

#124 repeat

One more comment from Alton Brown's lecture.  After he gave his speech full of humor and cooking tips and ways for collegians to eat well with little cash (ie: crash a potluck, learn to appreciate art and go to openings for the free food, Dumpster diving at fine restaurants, etc.), he offered a serious bonus nugget guaranteed to ensure the students' success.  His advice:  "Read, Research, Write, Repeat."

It sounds a lot like the advice I received from my doctoral advisor.  In addition to the above, his mantra was:  "Butt to Seat."  Dr. Andes believed that everyone who got into graduate school was smart enough to get out of it; the only distinguishing factor between those who left with "initials after their name" was the degree to which they applied his advice.  If you applied the discipline to actually sit at the computer or microfiche machine in the library (hey, I'm old!), then you would plod along and eventually write that dissertation.

So much of success is grunt work, and not the sexy stuff.  It revolves around that key word "repeat".  The discipline of putting one foot after another, over and over and over again, until you are conditioned enough to run that marathon.  Writing one word after another, until you are on Blog #124 and then #1124. Traveling to one state capitol then two then three until you have seen all 50.  Someone once said:  "The key to excellence is consistency.  It is doing what you do well over and over again."  

Life is like shampoo instructions.  You lather up the good bubbles, you rinse out the bad stuff and you repeat it again tomorrow.  Have the discipline to stay on task for the important things -- and repeat.

-- beth triplett
leadershipdots.blogspot.com
@leadershipdots
leadershipdots@gmail.com

#123 personal responsibility

Part of what allowed Alton Brown the flexibility to stay for his two hours of book signings (see #122 from yesterday) was that he flew into town on his private plane.  No chance of cutting people off because he had "a plane to catch"; he was the pilot and could set his own schedule.

Mr. Brown did not always know how to fly a plane.  His first book came out in 2001, and just after the attacks of 9-11 he was scheduled for a 20+ city tour to promote it.  Post-9-11 flying was grueling, and he knew that he could not continue to endure such stress over the long haul.  So after his first tour, he committed to learn how to fly so he would not have to put up with commercial aviation's harassment and delays.  He now pilots his own plane and has much less stress and much more latitude in how his tour functions.  Personal responsibility seems to be an ingredient in his recipe for success.

Contrast that with a local business owner who runs a Greek restaurant.  I went to dine there this weekend, but was greeted with a handwritten sign at the register which read "No Lettuce".  Their Aegean salad is their signature item and they ran out of lettuce.  What?!  It is not as if lettuce is a unique and hard to obtain item; the dish boy could have run to the local market and picked up a few heads and they would have been all set.  But, unlike Mr. Brown, this entrepreneur didn't take personal responsibility for ensuring his success.  He left his short-term destiny in the hands of external forces.

Which type of person are you -- the one who takes ownership of the situation and learns to fly, or the one who puts up a "no lettuce" sign and waits until the next delivery comes?  Challenge yourself to take lessons from Alton Brown and think of ways to solve your problem yourself instead of accepting the limitations others impose.  

-- beth triplett
leadershipdots.blogspot.com
@leadershipdots
leadershipdots@gmail.com

#122 a winning recipe

I have a sign hanging above my stove that reads "I only have a kitchen because it came with the house."  So when our university announced that Alton Brown, Food Network Iron Chef star and creator of the Good Eats series, was our featured speaker for Homecoming, I wasn't exactly impressed.  That was before I met him.

His lecture yesterday was a quirky blend of humor and information -- actually modeling what great teaching is about -- but what made the biggest impression on me was his post-show performance.  Mr. Brown was on stage for about 75 minutes -- and then spent the next 120 minutes signing and posing for photos.  The line snaked around the room, and he stayed for every last person to have whatever they brought signed by him.  He autographed books, of course, but also kitchen implements, programs, posters, magazines, DVDs, recipe holders, towels, and even the shirt someone was wearing.  Most impressively, he spent time with each person -- shaking their hand, answering questions, posing for photos -- and in that minute or so, acting as if the other person was the only person in the room.  He was gracious, personable, humble, patient and encouraging.  He certainly went way beyond my expectations with how much care he bestowed on those who waited to see him.

Maybe I was more conscious about his behavior because I am in the middle of reading Choosing Civility (by P.M. Forni).  Our community foundation made copies available at cost and is in the middle of a city-wide reading/discussion program about civility and how to foster such behavior in our town.  Forni writes about 25 rules of "considerate conduct" and today Mr. Brown modeled all those I have read so far, especially "pay attention" and "acknowledge others".  In the middle of signing hundreds of books, he specifically recognized those who were (part of the thousand people in attendance and ) among the 25 people who came up to the microphone and asked a question during his lecture, and commented on the question they asked!  For each and every person, he held out his hand and greeted them ("Hello, I'm Alton"), which of course led to the sharing of their name and a discussion ensued.  Not just with person #1, but every single person in this incredibly long line.  

The 800 people who left without having something signed certainly had an entertaining afternoon, but they missed the most important lessons that Mr. Brown had to offer.  Apparently with "good eats" comes good manners, and it was a treat to savor seeing both.

-- beth triplett
leadershipdots.blogspot.com
@leadershipdots
leadershipdots@gmail.com